Hero Profile: Big Barda

You can find heroes in the darkest of places and the most oppressive of environments. Even on a planet that is supposed to be a new version of Hell, apparently. Thankfully, Darkseid isn’t nearly as observant a taskmaster as Satan, Hades, or other overseers of the afterlife. Otherwise someone like Barda couldn’t have gotten her start.

Be prepared for a concussion.

Big Barda is one of the New Gods. Which is good. Such a heritage comes with a lot of power and an exceedingly long life. But of the two New God worlds, she was born on Apokolips. Which is bad. Very, very bad. She’s relatively young, having only been born about 250 years ago. Remember, Darkseid predates the human race. She is the daughter of Big Breeda, an Apokoliptian warrior of some renown. Despite this, she was taken away to be trained as a warrior by Granny Goodness, at her Home for Orphaned Youth. Yes, most of the Orphans there are not in fact Orphans, and yes Granny Goodness’s name is ironic. She’s a terrible human being…er New God. The motto of the Orphanage is “Die for Darkseid,” an ideal she tries to instill into her charges. Granny had big plans for Barda, grooming her to be the leader of Female Fury Battalion. Again, Furies by definition Female, so I don’t understand why you need to qualify them at all. Granny specializes in breaking down young Apokoliptian psyches, turning them into the ever loyal minions of Darkseid.

While in training, Barda met Scott Free. In case you missed my Darkseid’s Profile, Scott is the son of the Leader of the good New Gods, the Highfather. He and Darkseid exchanged sons as part of a peace agreement between their peoples. While Highfather took Darkseid’s son, Orion, in and raised him as his own, Scott was left to grow up under Granny’s tutelage. Barda sensed an innate goodness and peace in Scott Free, something she’d never known on Apokolips. It was a nice change. Do I even need to say she fell for the guy? No? Alright, moving on. While most of her friends were eventually broken by Granny and turned into Darkseid’s slaves, Barda kept fighting Granny’s control while still pretending to be as loyal as others.

Just a normal night out for the Frees.

Barda, possibly moved by Scott Free’s innate goodness or an innate spark of rebellion fostered by Apokoliptian oppressive regime, decided to work with rebel New God Himon. She and several Furies work with Himon for a while before they decide to go with one of their crazier plans, getting Scott Free off of Apokolips. While emotionally torn by Scott’s departure, she elected to stay on Apokolips for a few years to help continue to destabilize Darkseid’s regime. This was especially important since Scott’s departure from Apokolips effectively broke the peace treaty between New Genesis and Apokolips, allowing Darkseid to wage open war once more. Retrospectively speaking, getting Scott to leave probably wasn’t the best idea. Just saying.

Eventually, Barda fled Apokolips and was reunited with Scott Free, who had started a career as the escape artist Mister Miracle. They were married a few years later by the Highfather. Big Barda and Mister Miracle had an on again off again relationship with being superheroes. They tried to retire for a bit, though Barda kept up her own physical training by leading a defense-training program for women she called the New Furies. Big Barda joined the Justice League after “temping” with them a few times while guarding Scott. Barda, as kind of a nice twist on the usual superhero relationship paradigm, is fiercely protective of the physically weaker Scott. Any who attempt to harm him, which occasionally includes Scott himself with his death defying stunts, must face her incredible wrath. I do not envy him.

And I thought Hawkwoman's
headgear was intense.

Big Barda, as a New God, is blessed with a lot of power. She’s immensely strong and resistant to injury, on par with Superman and Wonder Woman. So yeah, avoid her fists if possible. She is virtually invulnerable, immune to most disease and even largely immune to aging. She’s been trained to use her immense strength most effectively. She’s been trained in most forms of Apokoliptan combat. She’s got enough strength and skill that she once fought Wonder Woman to a draw. Remember her, strong as Superman and as skilled a fighter as Batman? So yeah, effectively as powerful as the Big Three of the Justice League. Her preferred weapon is the Omega-Rod, a weapon that fired powerful blasts of energy strong enough to bring Superman to his knees. It can also let her teleport great distances, manipulate gravity, and she can hit people on the head with it. Sometimes simple is best. She can fly thanks to Apokolitian tech known as Aero-Discs. She’s got nearly indestructible armor that adds to her durability. And a Motherbox that lets her make wormholes to travel across the universe. She’s fully accessorized.

Big Barda has appeared in a number of DC series.

She appeared in Superman/Batman: Apocalypse. Barda is attempting to live a simple life in an Earth suburb. Not an easy task for a New God. She is recruited by Bats, Sups, and… Wonds to get them onto Apokalpse to save Supergirl from Darkseid and Granny Goodness. She smacks around her former Furies while the others take on Darkseid and the brainwashed Supergirl. And, while Scott Free himself doesn’t appear, his costume is next to all of Barda’s tech in her secret room.

That's just a well designed costume.

Big Barda and husband Mister Miracle appear in a Justice League: Unlimited episode entitled “The Ties that Bind.” In it, the pair are forced to help their old slave driver Granny Goodness reclaim Kalibak, Darksied’s oldest son. The old bat kidnapped the Frees’ friend Oberon. Granny’s main rival on Apokolips, Virman Vundabar, copied Granny’s plan to try to brainwash Kalibak to be used as a puppet dictator who he controls behind the throne. With help from Wally West, (Flash 3) they liberate Kalibak. Expecting a doublecross, the swap Kalibak for Martian Manhunter, whom them uses his telepathy to locate Oberon. He’s liberated, and Kalibak is imprisoned on Earth, thus ensuring the civil war on Apokolips continues. Oh, and Barda gets to punch Granny in the face. Everybody wins!

Barda appears as part of a future Justice League in Batman Beyond. She’s less than thrilled at the young Batman joining the JLA. Unbeknownst to her, Terry McGinnis had been recruited by Superman to locate a traitor in the Leagues ranks. The traitor in fact turns out to be a brain controlled Superman. After saving them all from the alien mind controller known as Starro, he earns her respect. Again, Scott Free doesn’t appear in person, but Barda has a few pictures of her husband in her room.

I like Big Barda for a lot of the same reasons that I like Wonder Woman. She goes against the usual female superhero stereotypes. She’s a no nonsense brawler that wants to fight at the drop of a hat. Like I said before, in her relationship she’s the strong one and the overprotective one. In a few regards she’s a lady Superman. She’ll smack you around if you look at her funny. The burly, blunt, bruising Big Bertha. Next time, the mystical Zatanna Zatara. 

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Villain Profile: Darkseid

Hello, everyone, today we’re going to be talking about Darkseid.

POWER, Unlimited Power!

No Deadpool, that’s a quote from Emperor Palpatine, a master of the Dark Side of the Force. I’m talking about Dark-

Oh, then you must be talking about that things that Lord Voldy More used in those Harry Potter books.

It’s Voldemort, and he use the Dark Arts. I am referring to Dark-

All fall before Darkseid

That movie from that Jim Henson puppet guy with the big ugly purple rock?

You're thinking of the Dark Crystal, for some sick reason. Would you please just let me talk about Dark-

No, no, no, I got this. It’s that oddly fit billionaire with abandonment issues, dresses like a flying rodent.

That’s Batman, the Dark Knight.

Oh, then are we talking about his car? That big, black scary car?

Deadpool, that’s just a Dark Ride. Will you just let me do my job?

You’re getting paid for this now?

Figure of speech. Now get out of here, I’ve got work to do.

Fine, Mr. Grouchypants.

Now, Darkseid. He was born Uxas, son of King Yuga Khan and Queen Heggra of Apokolips. He and his family are a race of immortal gods that, according to my research, were born/create from the destruction of the Norse Gods during Ragnarok. Which may explain the weird names too, just saying. Apokolips is the home of the new darker Gods, while the good Gods reside on New Genesis. Now, Uxas was every bit as evil as you’d expect the child of two evil Gods to be. He constantly schemed and secretly battled with his mother for control of Apokolips after Yuga Khan got himself stuck in an alternate dimension. That guy was Uberevil, making the future Darkseid seem like a kitten in comparison, so we're better off without him. They were pretty much deadlocked until Uxas’ brother Drax discovered and sought to control the powerful Omega Force. Now, being a bit of a dick, Uxas attacked his brother, fatally wounding him and claiming the Omega Force for himself. Uxas was morphed into a new rock like body and was given complete control of the Omega Force.

Rechristening himself Darkseid, he returned to Apokolips and seized control of the planet. Despite being a cold, calculating, cruel, and all around dick of a being, Darkseid fell in love. Shocking, right? He and his lover, Suli, had a son named Kalibak, just before she was poisoned. Apparently Mama Heggra didn’t approve of the arrangement, and then pushed her son to marry another Apokoliptian named Tigra. She’d gotten Apokolips’ token backstabbed Desaad to poison Suli. Feeling turnabout was fair play, Darkseid got Desaad to poison his mother. After that, he also killed Tigra for… reasons. But not before the two of them had son, Orion. A short time later, Darkseid and the leader of New Genesis the Highfather reached a deal to end the millennial long war between their planets. The two monarch’s traded sons. Worst. Family. Ever.

Darkly Dreaming Darkseid

Orion grew up on New Genesis, becoming a heroic and stalwart guardian of New Genesis ideals. This must have been a particularly powerful punch to Darkseid’s ego, the son of the wife he detested not only becoming a great hero, but was also prophesized later to be the one to kill Darkseid. Poor planning on your part bucko. Oh, and the son he was given, Scott Free, eventually became a heroic escape artist going by Mister Miracle. Darkseid really, really sucks at this whole parenting thing.

Darkseid’s greatest obsession is with the Anti-Life Equation. The Equation is a mathematical formula, of sorts, that gives whomever unravels it control over the minds of sentient beings. Interestingly, Darkseid believes that part or all of the equation exists in the subconscious of Humanity, hence his obsession with conquering Earth. The full mathematical equation was eventually revealed to be: loneliness + alienation + fear + despair + self-worth ÷ mockery ÷ condemnation ÷ misunderstanding × guilt × shame × failure × judgment n=y where y=hope and n=folly, love=lies, life=death, self=dark side. With it, Darkseid temporarily gained control over all life in existence. Disturbing, no? The various heroes gained immunity to the effects, for example, the Flash (Barry Allen) was completely immune to its effects thanks to his connection to the Speed Force. I guess different cosmic forces can cancel each other out or something.

Darkseid has proven to be one of the greatest foes of, well, life in the DC universe. His most frequent foe being Superman, the Justice League, and his son Orion. Cruel, sadistic, and utterly heartless, Darkseid will not stop until he’s complete control of reality, or until he dies.

A fight to the finish, it's going to take
a while.

Darkseid’s immense power is derived from both his Apokaliptian heritage and from the Omega Force. The Omega Force manifests itself mostly in the Omega Beams, powerful energy blasts that he shoots from his eyes. Anything that is hit by the Beams, baring immensely powerful beings like Superman and the monster Doomsday, is vaporized. Or reassembled, depending on Darkseid’s mood. You can probably guess that he doesn’t use the resurrection effect too often. He has near pinpoint control of the Beams, altering their direction as he wishes. So, yeah, running away isn’t really an option when the Beam literally bends and twists around other objects to get at its target. He’s immensely powerful, being one of the few beings that can break Superman’s bones. He can move with Flash-like speeds, and react in nanoseconds. He’s also telepathic and telekinetic. Because, you know, an immortal, super being needs more powers. Darkseid is also incredibly intelligent, a typical quality in millennia old tyrants. He actually prefers to not dirty his hands for the most part, unless it’s with Superman’s blood, then he’ll dirty them until the cows come home.

Darkseid has appeared in many of DC’s series, usually opposite Superman. He’s almost always portrayed as the greatest foe Superman or the Justice League have ever come across. Gee, can’t imagine why.

Darkseid appeared in Superman: The Animated Series (1996) being voiced by Michael Ironside. He attacks Earth on several occasions, and is only stopped when Orion and New Genesis stepped in. In retaliation he obliterates Superman's friend and ally Dan Turpin. Darkseid continued to attack Earth, however, mostly though proxies like Intergang. He battled Superman one last time in the two part finale Legacy. He first brainwashes Superman into fighting alongside him during his invasion. Superman snaps out of it and the two superbeings have a no holds bar smack down. They fight in Darkseid's palace on Apokolips, and while Darkseid proves stronger, Superman is ultimately victorious by overloading Darkseid's Omega Beams. Pay back for Turpin, hell yes! Superman tells the Apokoliptian slaves of Darkseid's fall and that they’re free. To his shock, they get on their knees and help Darkseid back to his palace. He smugly explains as he departs, “I am many things, Kal-El. But here, I am God.” I love Ironside's performance in this series. He never speaks in more than a polite tone, he could be furious, he could be elated, the only real way to tell is when his eyes are on fire. Which, arguably, is a pretty decent sign of anger. I suggest looking up "The Best Darkseid Quotes" on Youtube, to get the full effect. He's absolutely chilling.

Say what you like about Darkseid, but he makes a hell of
an entrance.

He appears in the sequel show, Justice League in 2001. He tricks the League, making them believe that they are going up against their mutual foe Brainiac. This turns out to be a ploy, Darkseid having offered the evil computer Superman and the League in exchange for Apokolips’ safety. This turns out to be a triple cross, as Darkseid planned to use Brainiac’s ship for his own evil plan. Darkseid is ultimately killed by the ship self-destructing.

He returns, again, in the Justice League: Unlimited finale, being resurrected by a dark sorceress as a final Screw You to Lex Luthor. He’s combined with the left over tech of Brainiac, becoming an even more powerful force. He marshals his warring forces back on Apokolips before striking at Earth again. He’s only defeated by the combined efforts of the Heroes and Villains, specifically Superman, Batman, and Lex Luthor. It’s a heck of an ending.

He only appeared in what was the season finale of Young Justice, shaking hands with Vandal Savage. Whatever they had had planned for season 3, it would have been terrifying.

He was the final villain of the live action Smallville. He appeared mostly in shadows, operating through his minions Granny Goodness, Gordon Godfrey, and Desaad (whom are all human this go round). This version of the character doesn’t really have a physical form, is nigh omnipotent, and capable of possessing people with darkness in their hearts. Which is basically everyone. His overall plan is to 1.) Corrupt as many humans as possible, signified by an omega branded to their skull, 2.) Destroy any and all heroes that may stop him, and 3.)  Summon Apokolips to Earth, via said omega brands, to destroy it. He comes this close, my pointer finger is basically touching my thumb, to succeeding. A perfect ending villain to an above average show.

Darkseid was also the central antagonist of Superman/Batman: Apocalypse, where he sought to recruit Superman’s cousin, Supergirl, into his female fighting force known as the Furies. It’s up to Superman, Batman, Wonder Woman and the defected captain of the Furies, Big Barda to rescue her. The films climax is Superman and Supergirl vs. Darkseid at the Kent family farm. They need a new barn after it’s all said and done.

Well, we can kiss our butts goodbye.

Darkseid is the central antagonist, shocking, in Justice League: War, voiced by voice acting heavy weight Steven Blum. Don’t recognize the name? Look him up on Wikipedia, if you don’t see an animated show you know on that list I’ll owe you a nickel. You want the details on this one? Look up my previous post on the movie.

Think of the evilest, vilest character you can. Odds are, if it’s not Darkseid, then your character pales in comparison. He is a dark god of cruelty and horror rivaling and, in my opinion, surpassing that of the Prince of Darkness, Lucifer, himself. He will sink to any depth, attack any weakness, and destroy anything and everything that gets in his way. You want to know the closest thing to kindness he’s ever done? It’s not permanently vaporizing Kalibak when he screws up. Darkseid will still obliterate his son, the child of the one wife that he loved, and/or see him writhe in agony, just to teach him a lesson. Heck, in the Justice League episode I mentioned, his ultimate plan was to use Brainiac’s ship to destroy reality, Apokolips included, to reshape it in his own image. His homeworld means nothing to him. His spawn mean nothing to him. (The only time he acknowledges Orion as his son is when he’s trying to force the hero to act like his dear ol’ Dad.) Life means nothing to him. In his mind, anything that brings joy, love, comfort, or anything that remotely resembles a good feeling is something to be destroyed. All that live are meant to serve him. He is the eternal master of suffering and woe, king of despair and pain, the malevolent master of misery and hatred, the dark despot of death, Darkseid.

Next time, post #100 and start of my Women of DC theme week, featuring Wonder Woman.

 http://img2.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20111206221807/marvel_dc/images/e/e5/Darkseid_The_Nail_001.png

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