Wednesday, December 31, 2014

Hero Profile: She-Hulk



Let’s play a little game. No complaining. Let’s pretend you are a lawyer. Your current case is a class action lawsuit against Iron Man aka Tony Stark. You have a sizeable amount of evidence and a winning strategy in mind to convince the jury that Mr. Stark should pay a hefty sum to your clients. You are very confident that you’ll win this case. And yet, when you look over at Tony Stark lounging in the defendant’s chair he’s got an incredibly smug smile on his face. Is he drunk? Probably, he’s been known to relapse, but his air of self-confidence is a little too strong for drunken delirium. Then his lawyer walks in. A seven foot tall, well-muscled, bright green but still incredibly gorgeous woman with her own confident smile. Your stomach drops when you realize that Mr. Stark’s lawyer is Jennifer Walters, the She-Hulk. By the time her opening statement is finished, hope is pretty much lost, but you need to still power through. Bad luck, mate. See, wasn’t that fun? It was for me. Now, on with the show.
She must spend more on clothes than your
average female stereotype.
Jennifer Walter’s started out life as a small, meek young woman with dreams of being a top notch lawyer in LA. She was relatively successful, but far from the top when her cousin Bruce Banner visited her in her office. They’d been very close growing up, in some ways they were more like siblings than cousin, so Jennifer was delighted to see him. She became slightly less happy with the visit when Bruce confided in her that he was the Incredible Hulk and thus a wanted man. Jen, while shocked that her mild mannered cousin turned into such an aggressive beast, was supportive and suggested that they discuss Bruce’s problems at length at her home. Unfortunately, a pair of gangsters tailed them. The two nameless thugs worked for a crime boss that Jennifer was prosecuting. The second the cousins stepped out of the car, the gunmen shot Jennifer in the back. Bruce was able to distract the gunmen with a garden hose and rushed Jennifer to safety. Those two should consider themselves lucky that Bruce’s fear for Jennifer was greater than his rage at them for shooting her. We avoided a double helping of Thug Street Pizza. Thank goodness.
Jennifer was losing blood fast, and as such Bruce needed to work faster to save her. He got Jennifer to a nearby clinic, but it was unfortunately closed. He broke, and gave Jennifer an infusion of his blood. Thankfully they were the same blood type, or this would have been messy. After Jennifer was stable, Bruce called an ambulance before escaping out of fear that the police officers also called would recognize him. Jennifer was recovering in a hospital bed when the Goons that shot her earlier snuck in dressed as doctors. They restrained Jennifer and tried to smother her with chloroform. It was at this opportune moment that the side effects of Bruce’s blood became apparent. Jennifer morphed into the incredibly strong She-Hulk. In her new titanic body, Jennifer was able to quickly disable the thugs, and force a confession out of them before returning to her hospital room, reverting to normal without anyone being the wiser.
She-Hulk Vol 3 1 Stegman Variant Textless
Never seen someone more happy to
smash things.
Since her first outing as the She-Hulk, Jennifer has done incredibly well for herself. She has become a very successful attorney, and also a regular member of the Avengers. She has represented several of her teammates and fellow superheroes on civil cases, and to my knowledge has only lost once, when a supervillain/mercenary named Constrictor sued Hercules (yes he’s a superhero now too) for excessive force. She’s subbed in for the Thing on the Fantastic Four’s team roster. And she has even gone toe to toe with her cousin on one of his really bad days. She-Hulk’s come way up in the world.
Jennifer Walters is an accomplished and skilled attorney. She is soft spoken and intelligent, and widely considered to be one of the best lawyers in the world. In her She-Hulk form she is incredibly strong, fast and durable. She isn’t as powerful as the Hulk himself, but she is several times stronger than just about any other character. Her body is described as having Amazonian proportions, long limbs, lean muscle and yet still has a healthy amount of curves. Unlike her cousin, Jennifer does have a degree of control over herself in She-Hulk form, but like Bruce it isn’t perfect. As a matter of fact, Jennifer has recently realized that she is basically addicted to her She-Hulk form. Let me explain, as the She-Hulk, Jennifer loses a lot of her impulse control and inhibitions. She’s loud, boisterous, and ready to throw down at a moment’s notice. Basically the polar opposite of what her “normal” personality is like. Speaking as a more introverted person, I can understand how someone could love and perhaps lose the ability to control the switch that just turns off their inhibitions. It’s something that sounds wonderful and yet terrifying. Her She-Hulk personality was so…uncontrolled that for a time she was asked to leave the Avenger’s Mansion (their HQ) until she got a handle on things. She has, and is now back on the roster.
She-Hulk vs. Red She-Hulk. I'll be on the moon until this
blows over.
Also unlike her cousin, Jennifer isn’t a berserker in a fight. What I mean is She-Hulk is an accomplished hand-to-hand combatant, having been trained by Captain America and Gamora, which she uses in tandem with her immense strength. So, whereas the Hulk would stop an attacker by attacking harder, She-Hulk could block said attack and then counter it. It’s a more efficient way to fight.
She-Hulk has made a few spotty appearances in the greater Marvel-verse. She’s mostly seen as a guest character on shows like the Fantastic Four series.
She was a recurring and later primary character on The Incredible Hulk TV series of the mid-90s. It’s been years since I watched it, and the only scene I remember is Hulk seeing She-Hulk on a Hang glider and rather stupidly saying “Jen-I-Fer, fly?” If that’s enough to get you to check it out, more power to ya.
She-Hulk Vol 1 7 Textless
Is there a Woman's Big and Tall?
If not, I shotty this idea.
She is the only major female character on Hulk and the Agents of S.M.A.S.H. She appears alongside the Hulk, Red Hulk, the alien Hulk (and also her cousin’s son) Skarr, and the blue Hulk, A-bomb. She and Hulk have a very strong relationship, apparently Bruce is 100% in control of the Hulk in this universe. In an early episode She-Hulk’s comments that Hulk was so overprotective of her, he wouldn’t let her take on Batroc the Leaper, a joke villain in the Disney/Marvel-verse that jumps a lot. It’s not the best show around, but I’ve laughed a few times at it, so give it a shot if you’d like.
She hasn’t appeared in any film, though that isn’t through lack of trying. There have been two TV movie attempts and one real film attempt in the early 90s but nothing came of it. I’d like to see a live action version of her in the Marvel Movie-verse, but that would most likely be contingent on another Hulk movie which isn’t happening anytime soon.
I enjoy She-Hulk. It would have been so easy to make her just a female clone of her cousin, all rage no substance. Instead she’s an entertaining mix of strength and smarts. While she isn’t up to the original Hulk in terms of strength, she can run circles around the burly beast in terms of strategy and general thought. Heck, over the years she’s become a complex enough character to have vices and rock bottom low points. Despite the harder points in her life, She-Hulk remains a cheerful and vibrant character that is every bit as recognizable as the original Irritable Green Giant. She may have begun her career as a lady sidekick/counterpart to the Hulk, but she has since grown into a character that is arguably more interesting than the Hulk. She’s a heavyweight champion both in a fight and in the courtroom, the incredible She-Hulk. Next time, she’s pintsized but it’s best to never call her a pixie, the indomitable Wasp.

 http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/She-Hulk
 http://www.comicvine.com/forums/battles-7/she-hulk-vs-red-she-hulk-531236/
 http://marvel.wikia.com/Jennifer_Walters_%28Earth-616%29

Tuesday, December 30, 2014

Hero Profile: Rescue



Behind every great man is a great woman. Considering how great Tony Stark thinks he is, Virginia “Pepper” Potts has to be one of the greatest women on the planet. Or perhaps the most patient. Pepper is one of the oldest characters of the Iron Man series, but has been rather spotty in her appearances. There was a ten to fifteen year gap between her appearances. This is a good and bad thing. The bad is of course that she was more or less dropped for a number of years. That’s just being a dick to your characters. The good is that she is one of the most developed female characters. She started off as a doe-eyed bit of eye candy, but today is perhaps the most accomplished woman in the Marvel-verse. She’s CEO of a Stark corporation, how many other people can say that?
She makes this look good.
Pepper began as a secretary at Stark Industries before becoming Tony’s personal assistant. She’d found an accounting error that Tony himself had missed, which he probably found simultaneously impressive and annoying. She was almost instantly smitten with her new boss, but Tony being Tony, he didn’t pay her too much attention. As a matter of fact he doesn’t seem to realize his own feelings for her until after she married his friend and chauffer Harold “Happy” Hogan. Pepper and Happy drop out of the comic book scene for a number of years, they make a guest appearance every now and then but weren’t primary characters again until around 2000. Which, interestingly enough, is just before the Iron Man movie. What a coincidence.
She doesn’t really get much in terms of significant character development until the Civil War. She’d once again become Tony’s secretary and Happy had gone back to his chauffer duties. Part way through the Civil War storyline, Happy Hogan is kidnapped and used as live bait against Tony by a villain known as Spymaster. Happy is able actually able to fight off the supervillain for a time, before flinging the both of them down several stories. Happy is left in a vegetative state, and at Pepper’s request, Tony quietly deactivates Happy’s life support. It isn’t much, but it is a lot more development than she received during that ten plus year absence I mentioned earlier.
Rescue Earth-616
She can't actually blast you,
But she can tear your arms off.
After that, she takes part in the Fifty State Initiative. FSI was a government run program aimed at putting a team of superheroes in every state of the union. The Midwest guys probably got the easiest detail, just saying. Pepper is given the codename Hera and is put in charge of coordinating and monitoring team missions. It’s not the easiest or most glamourous job Pepper has ever had, but it’s her first real attempt at the whole superhero thing. And she was damn good at it. After the project was shut down, damn budget cuts, she was offered another job from Tony, which she graciously accepts. I’d be calling it nepotism if she wasn’t really, really qualified by this point. She is pretty much a secretary again, until she’s caught in a terrorist bombing. Them’s the brakes when you work for Tony Stark.
Pepper is badly injured, lots of shrapnel wounds and multiple injuries to her organs. Being the sort to find creative solutions while under pressure, Tony implants a powerful magnet into her chest to keep the damage from worsening. Huh, Tony must have been suffering from some serious bit of deja vu while setting up that one. The implant saves Pepper’s life, and has the weird side effect of clearing up her Tinnitus. Lifesaving, and annoyance removing, its brilliant. She receives further cybernetic upgrades, turning her into more or less into a cyborg.
She is made CEO of Stark Enterprises when Tony is forced to go into hiding. Norman Osborn, aka the Green Goblin, was placed as director of a new government agency known as H.A.M.M.E.R and unlike SHIELD, they were too lazy to make it a real acronym. Oh, and it’s evil. While making it seem like Osborn has the world’s best interest at heart he is really after the Superhuman Registration Act database, which has a number of superheroes secret ID’s recorded, and is stored in Tony’s brain. While acting as CEO, Pepper discovered a secret chamber in Tony’s office which had a Mark 1616 armor inside. Shockingly, it was in her size and compatible with her electromagnetic pacemaker. Naming it the Rescue Armor, Pepper flew off to help Tony. They are able to save the database from Osborn, consummate their relationship, and even restore Tony’s mind (it had been damaged as he forcibly deleted the database from his memories). Down side, Tony had no idea about anything that happened over the last few years. Back to square one Miss Potts.  
Don't look so shocked Pepper. The surprising
thing is that it took Tony this long to design
you an Armor.
Rescue becomes a regular hero in her own right over the next few years, specializing in high speed search and rescue missions. The shield generators in her armor makes her able to pluck civilians out of the worst possible situations, from burning buildings to near drownings. Her armored exploits are cut prematurely short. J.A.R.V.I.S (Tony’s old AI) whom helped her control the Rescue armor, was compromised, making the computer program go rogue and attempt to kidnap Pepper to make her his bride? Or something like that, he was out of his mind. J.A.R.V.I.S is destroyed leaving Pepper without an armor, and forcing her back to her civilian life. But somehow I doubt Rescue is done for good, she’ll just be on vacation until Tony needs to have his butt saved. An assistant’s work is never done.
The magnetic field generator implanted in Pepper is similar to but fundamentally different than Tony’s Arc Reactor. It is non-weaponized, so she can’t fire a Repulsor blast from it, but she can manipulate electromagnetic fields and sense them at a distance. Pepper’s armor is based around the same principle, very few weapons and prioritizing defense and speed. She can create powerful electromagnetic shields, and fly at high speeds. In the armor she’s strong enough to bench press a building. She is also a capable business woman and CEO, she’s saved Tony’s business on a number of occasions while the boss was indisposed.
Pepper has spent most of career as a minor character, but has been gaining popularity in the last few years. She only has appeared as Rescue once, to my knowledge, but I could see that changing sometime in the near future.
I’d say that the biggest bump for Pepper was the Iron Man movies. She’s the no nonsense personal aid for Tony in the first film, and continues to grow throughout the next few films. She hasn’t been shown in her Rescue armor, but they do a nice little nod to it in Iron Man 3, with both her using Tony’s suit, and getting a few cybernetic upgrades by the end of the film. Who knows, maybe we’ll see a Rescue in Iron Man 4.
 She appeared in Iron Man: Armored Adventures, which is kind of a weird CGI series where Tony and the principle cast are reimagined as teenagers. Pepper is as energetic as her nickname would have you believe. It’s only mildly annoying. For most of the series she is merely a supporting character/love interest but she gets her armor by the final season, and while it’s a heavy redesign from the original, it’s still a great suit.
You’re probably wondering why I’m drawing attention to such a small character. Heck, she has spent less than five years as a superhero before losing her powers. The answer is simple, Pepper is a positive step forward for female characters. Look where she started, the lovesick puppy following Tony Stark around. She’s since walked away, had her own life, returned, and continually stepped up to help Tony and the rest of the Marvel-verse. Sure she’s a minor character now, but who know, some day Rescue could be a name as well-known as Iron Man or War Machine. Here’s hoping. Next time, Bruce Banner’s titanic cousin, Jennifer Walters the She-Hulk.
She swoops in like Superman to save the day. Way to go Pepper.

 http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pepper_Potts#cite_note-IronMan526-3
 http://marvel.wikia.com/Rescue
 https://forums.marvelheroes.com/discussion/29414/so-in-light-of-enhanced-lady-deadpool-enhanced-pepper-potts-rescue-armor
 http://www.trollishdelver.com/2013/03/pepper-potts-armours-up-in-new-iron-man.html

Monday, December 29, 2014

Hero Profile: Storm



The X-men are one of my favorite superhero teams. A group of superhumans that fight to protect humanity despite being largely distrusted and hated, what’s not to like? They also have some of the most interesting and diverse characters. And one of the best representations of that is Ororo Munroe, better known as Storm. Try saying her name out loud, it sounds like a dog trying to talk doesn’t it? Enough silly, on with the show.
X-man, Queen, Thief, she's a triple threat!
Ororo Munroe is the daughter of a Kenyan tribal priestess and an American photographer. Born in New York but raised in Cairo, Egypt, she was as happy as a clam until she was about six. The Suez Crisis erupted between Egypt and Israel, along with France and Britain. During this conflict a fighter jet was shot down and landed smack dab in the middle of the Munroe living room. Messy. Ororo was buried under tons of rubble, alongside her mother’s corpse. Understandably, she developed a pretty intense form of claustrophobia after that. It got so bad that when she found herself confined, provided there was room, she’d curl into a ball and be almost unresponsive until she was freed. Ororo dug her way out, but was left orphaned.
Being a resourceful and incredibly lucky little girl, she lived on the street until she was picked up by a local crime boss named Achmed el-Gibar, who trained her as a pickpocket. Ororo proved to be very, very good at this profession. In fact, she was only ever caught once, by none other than Charles Xavier, who was in Egypt on business. This proves to be something of a wakeup call to the now teenage Ororo, who then wanders into the Serengeti on something of a spiritual quest. While in the African wilderness she crossed paths with a few of Africa’s beasts; lions, gazelle, elephants, and the Black Panther. Yeah, apparently T’Challa was on his own walkabout at the time. The two hit it off wonderfully, but broke off their budding romance due to their goals. Ororo was looking for some sort of epiphany, and T'Challa was looking for vengeance. Pretty much polar opposite goals right there. It’s after they parted ways that her weather controlling abilities began to manifest. Damn, as if being a teenage orphan girl wasn’t hard enough without throwing superpowers in.
Amazing X-Men Annual Vol 2 1 Textless
Not a fan of the Mohawk, but someone
else can tell her.
A short while later, she met and befriended a witch-priestess named Ainet. Ainet became a surrogate mother to Ororo and began teaching the young Mutant about her craft. A drought hit their village, and Ororo took it as an opportunity to thank her new mother and her new home for their kindness. She made it rain for days just around their village. There was much rejoicing. This, unfortunately, also screwed up weather patterns for the entire region killing many animals and people. Ainet sensed the damage her adoptive-daughter had caused, and explained to Ororo how the gesture was nice, but incredibly stupid. Ainet taught Ororo how best to manipulate the weather so their village could prosper without destroying everybody else. Smart move.
For the next few years Ororo was worshipped as a rain goddess in her own, and several other villages. This all changed when our old pal Charles came to see her. He offered her a place on the X-men and Ororo accepted. She was given the codename Storm and quickly became one of the most powerful and respected members of the team. She has since help battle the X-men’s toughest foes like Magneto, Apocalypse, and Dark Phoenix, she has become a team leader for the X-men and the leader/guardian of the Morlocks (sewer dwelling Mutants that can’t pass for normal), married T’Challa and become Queen of Wakanda. She’s done pretty well for herself as person, and amazingly well for someone who’d been orphaned at six. She has since been divorced by T'Challa, which is sad. But, her rebound guy is Wolverine, which isn't so sad. She seems to have a thing for guys with sharp claws. Who knew?
Ororo Before the Storm Vol 1 1 Textless
Orphan to former Queen. Impressive.
Storm has a lot of powers. Some a little more obvious than others. She can control the weather for miles around on this, and several other, planet. She can rapidly cool or heat an area, manipulate precipitation, humidity, and moisture, create and channel lightning, create tornadoes, thunderstorms, blizzards, and hurricanes. She can also clear away these phenomena. She flies on wind currents, essentially creating a small personal tornado around her body, and others. She can also use her powers to break the bonds between H2O, creating Hydrogen and Oxygen, which allows her to breath underwater. Now we’re just getting silly. She also has dormant mystic potential. Like she needs more powers.  
She also is a skilled hand-to-hand fighter, having been trained by el-Gibar, Xavier, Wolverine, and Black Panther. So it should be pretty clear that she can mess you up. Its official, “Fighting like a girl” is no longer an insult. Spread the word folks! Damn, that was fast. We’re not even halfway through week one. She is also a gifted thief, and an extraordinary lock-picker. She once picked a lock with her teeth. She can survive in just about any environment, as her powers help her body to compensate for extreme heat or cold, as well as extreme speeds and altitudes/depths. In summation; Do. Not. Cross. Ororo. Munroe.
  Storm has proven to be one of the most popular X-men. She has appeared in just about every X-men series since her introduction.
Storm - Future
Not a great Storm, but a good one.
Much better than her Catwoman.
She was one of the most prominent characters on X-men the Animated Series. She had several episodes dedicated to her. One of the more interesting episodes was in season two, in a two-part episode entitled “Whatever It Takes.” In it, she is lured back to her home in Africa by a powerful psychic entity known as the Shadow King. The creature had possessed Storm’s “spiritual” son Mjnari in a gambit to get his spectral paws on Storm and her immense power. She was able to overpower the demon and trap it back in the Astral Plane. Another interesting episode was entitled “One Man’s Worth.” In this episode, assassins from the future went back in time and murdered Xavier before he became a Mutant icon. History is rewritten so that at their point in history, Mutants (under Magneto) are at war with the humans. Storm is a loyal follower of Magneto, alongside her husband, Wolverine. A time traveling Bishop, who was immune to the timeline change for…reasons, picks them up and gets them to help him save Xavier. This was a particularly interesting episode to see both how Wolverine and Storm work together as a couple, and to see how the characters acted in an even more backwards time, the 1950s. A particularly unfortunate restaurant owner told Storm to get out, since he had a no colored people sign. Storm was astonished by the obvious racism. Wolverine suggested that the owner apologize, or risk skewering. The ending of this episode, when history resets, is rather sad but beautiful, as the Storm and Wolverine of the Xavier-less timeline revert back to normal. Check it out.
http://static.comicvine.com/uploads/original/0/4762/1099829-storm22.jpg
Not a real Goddess, but I can see where
the confusion must have come from.
She was one of three teachers at the Xavier institute in X-men: Evolution. Storm and Wolverine take turns whipping the young Mutants into shape. One of the biggest changes for her was in the form of a nephew named Evan Daniels, (codenamed Spyke, the spelling irks me). It is very reminiscent of Mjnari in the older show, in that Evan is not Ororo’s son, and yet she has a very mothering attitude towards the boy. She also has an episode that does a call back to her African roots. In the episode, “African Storm” an evil African shaman simply called Houngan, comes to America and uses mysticism to bind Storm to his will in a bid to take over Africa. He uses her claustrophobia and the fears that the other X-men possess to keep the team off balance. She is freed and does the “You want my power? Then take it!” speech as a nice bit of revenge. Again, don’t mess with Storm.
She has appeared in four X-men movies, all portrayed by Halle Berry. I don’t love her as Storm but she does do her best. I am thankful that while she tried a Kenyan accent in the first movie, they dropped it for the sequels. Granted, I’d have preferred them having her prefect the accent but if my options were bad accent or no accent, I would go with no. A younger version of this Storm will appear in X-men: Apocalypse but there hasn’t been anything official as to who.
She's a playable character in the X-men: Legends 1 and 2, and is very useful with all of her lightning and wind related powers. I'm going to keep pitching this one until you've all sat down and played at least one of these games.
I really like Storm. Most versions of the character I’ve seen are a free spirited woman that is a lot like the weather she manipulates. Ever shifting, elegant, beautiful, and dangerous. She has a strong bond with her teammates, and has shown on more than one occasion that she’s willing to put the world and her friends/family before her own personal happiness. I particularly enjoyed the X-men The Animated Series version, due in part to her love of doing quasi-mystic chants before using her powers. “Winds howl, storms rage,” stuff like that. She’s very much a hurricane, the incredible Storm! Next time, Tony Stark’s assistant turned superhero, Rescue.

 http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Storm_%28Marvel_Comics%29
 http://marvel.wikia.com/Ororo_Munroe_%28Earth-616%29
 http://marvel-movies.wikia.com/wiki/Ororo_Munroe
 http://static.comicvine.com/uploads/original/0/4762/1099829-storm22.jpg