Before I get started, let’s have a moment of silence for the
late, great Adam West. He was a Batman unlike any other. … Alright, moving on.
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| Diana blocks all the bullets. |
Sorry it’s been so long. It’s
unprofessional, I know, but my real life has been rather busy. And,
furthermore, I had a devil of a time getting to see this movie. I went out to
see Wonder Woman three times before I was actually able to see it. First, the
theater I went to had only one convenient showing, but since it was on their
‘Ultra Screen’ or whatever, they were charging nearly $20 a ticket. Too rich
for my blood. Second time, went to a theater farther away, that I knew would be
cheaper, but since it was $5 movie Tuesday, all the shows were basically sold
out. So, finally, after nearly two weeks of attempts I finally got to see it,
and it was very much worth it. Let’s get to it.
We open to Diana Prince, in modern
day Paris at her day job as a museum curator. She receives a metal brief case
from our favorite DC billionaire, Bruce Wayne. She opens it, and is very pleasantly
surprised. Via a Note, Bruce explains that he’d spent some time since the
Doomsday incident tracking down the original WWI era photo of Diana and her
team. Said picture make Diana think about her entire life story. I’ve heard of
crazier framing devices.
Diana was born on the Island of
Themyscira, the only child to be found on the island. She was the biological
daughter of Queen Hippolyta, but is essentially the child of the island. Despite
her mother’s insistence that Diana stay away from weapons or the art of war,
she clearly is drawn to battle like a fish to water. In an attempt to dissuade
her from the path of a warrior, Hippolyta explains the Amazon’s backstory. In
this universe, Zeus made humans and for a time, things were good. But Ares, Zeus’
jealous son, corrupted them and caused the humans to start fighting amongst
themselves. Zeus created the Amazons to protect humankind, and help end the
chaos. Ares slew his fellow gods, and mortally wounded his father before being
struck down. Using the last of his strength, Zeus created the isle of
Themyscira, transported the Amazon’s there, created a protective field around
it, and breathed life into Diana. Hippolyta had shaped the girl from clay, FYI.
He also left the amazons with a weapon to kill Ares, should he return. That’s a
lot of stuff for someone to do with the ‘last of their strength,’ but this is
Zeus we’re talking about here, so yeah.
Diana is trained to fight by her
aunt, General Antiope, first in secret, then much more openly once Hippolyta
discovered her sister’s actions. Flashforward a non-disclosed amount of time,
and Diana is a nearly peerless warrior, able to fight multiple opponents, and
just all around awesome. She accidentally injures Antiope in a training
exercise, by making some sort of energy barrier/shockwave, and goes off to
brood. Which is good, since she stood in just the right spot to see a plane
pass through the barrier around their island, and hit the water. She dives in,
and saves the pilot, Steve Trevor.
 |
| These two want to destroy the world. Or something. Their motivations are a little vague. |
Minutes later, Themyscira is
invaded by the German soldiers pursuing him. An all out brawl ensues, between
the German forces and the Amazons. The warrior women prove victorious, but
Antiope is slain in the crossfire. Trevor is taken in for questioning. Under
the influence of the ‘Lasso of Hestia’ aka the Lasso of Truth, Trevor explains
what happened. He is an American soldier, assigned to British Intelligence as a
spy. He infiltrated a German weapons facility in the Ottoman Empire, and
discovered that Dr. Isabel Maru, aka Dr. Poison, had been developing weapons of
mass destruction. Specifically, a kind of mustard gas that eats through gas
masks. Considering standard mustard gas is a thing of pure evil, you can
understand why this is bad. She’s working under orders of General Erich
Ludenorff, whom somehow believes that the Germans can still win the war,
despite lack of soldiers, food, and other resources. Seizing an opportunity,
Trevor stole Maru’s notes and made a break for it. Unfortunately, the German
forces followed. Diana, believing that this is all the work of Ares, wants to
help stop him. Hippolyta isn’t convinced, though, and forbids it.
Diana, not one to be deterred,
steals the Lasso, some armor, and the Godkiller sword. She and Trevor are
caught attempting to leave, but Hippolyta relents. She banishes her daughter,
but wishes her well on her quest. She also gives Diana the headband/tiara that her aunt Antiope wore. Hippolyta advises her daughter to be worthy of said tiara.
Sometime later, they arrive in
London, and after a snafu with some German spies, and getting Diana some
inconspicuous clothing, arrive at the Supreme War Council. After some
political hoop jumping, and some failed codebreaking on behalf of British
Intelligence, Diana is able to translate Maru’s notes. They’re planning to
release the super mustard gas at the war front. Trevor and Diana want to stop
the plan, but are forbidden to do so by Trevor’s superiors. He decides to say,
‘screw it,’ and assembles a team with Diana. They recruit spy Sameer, a
marksman named Charlie, and a smuggler known as the Chief to help them. They
are able to do this thanks to secret funding by a member of the War Council,
Sir Patrick Morgan. He’s trying to negotiate an armistice with the Germans, but
knows super mustard gas is something that probably shouldn’t be allowed to
exist.
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| Diana and Trevor enjoying a horse rider. Before taking on machine guns, |
The group travels to Belgium, where
they believe the Germans will release the gas. Trevor and co want to press on,
but they are somewhat delayed by the front line. Trench warfare has a habit of disrupting travel plans, what with the deep trenches and machine guns everywhere. The men folk want to walk
around, but Diana is moved by the pleas of the locals and tries the direct
approach. She unveils her red and blue uniform, draws her sword and shield and
charges. She almost singlehandedly takes down the entire German force, and
frees the small town of Veld. The guys help, a little. The team celebrates
victory, taking that famous photo, and bond a little.
The team learn of a gala at the nearby German
High Command. There, they assume Ludendorff is going to show off the super gas.
Trevor infiltrates the party, in an attempt to find and destroy the gas. Diana,
though, believes that Ludendorff is Ares in human form and that killing him with stop
the war. She seems to be under the impression that Ares has the entirety of the
Central Powers forces under some kind of mind control. Diana is... about as naive as you'd expect someone who spent her entire life on an island. She attempts to kill
Ludendorff, but is stopped by Trevor. He feared such an… open attack will just
make the war worse. Ludendorff, having not been un-alived as Deadpool would put
it, launches his gas on Veld, killing them all. Diana rushes to the city to try and do
something, but she’s far too late. After chastising Trevor for stopping her,
she goes after Ludendorff, to end things.
Good first, which is most of the
film. Gal Gadot was one of the best parts of Batman v. Superman, and she absolutely shines in her solo movie.
She’s confident but a little naïve, strong but kind, and just a delight from
start to finish. Side note, if a video exists, I’d love to see the reaction that the young actresses Lilly Aspel and Emily Carey had to when the learned they’d get
to play two young Diana Prince’s. It’s probably hilarious. Chris Pine is
awesome as Steven Trevor. He’s his usual confident awesome self, but is clearly
conflicted about all he’s done, seen and will continue to have to do in the
Great War. True to many a soldier’s experience back then, or so I’ve read.
Danny Huston, whom I’ve had mixed feelings about since X-Men Origins: Wolverine, is decent as the clearly insane General
Ludendorff. Not the best villain I’ve ever seen, but better than his William
Stryker. The score is amazing, whomever wrote Wonder Woman’s theme music should
get a substantial raise. The action scenes, particularly the Amazons vs. The
Germans, and Diana storming No Man’s Land, are just amazing. They make
excellent use of Zack Snyder style slow-mo. I also really enjoy that, for most
of the movie, there is definitely this feeling that Diana isn’t really fighting
Ares. She’s fighting War itself, the seeming human need to cause harm to one
another. It’s really well done.
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| Diana Prince, always prepared. |
The bad is super minimal, and
mostly nitpicking. I’ll start with the biggest problem first, the side
characters. They aren’t bad, far from it, they’re woefully underutilized. We
have Said Taghmaoui as Sameer ‘Sammy’ the spy. He wanted to be an actor but was
forced into the life of a soldier due in part to his ethnicity. Ewen Bremner is
Charlie, an expert Scottish marksman whom suffers from PTSD. And Eugene Brave
Rock, as Chief, a Native American smuggler who is trading to both sides. He
left America as his people haven’t fared super well over there due to the
American Government. And that’s all we’re ever told about them. Sammy’s dreams
of acting, and Charlie’s PTSD seem important, but they’re almost forgotten as
soon as they’re revealed. Then there’s Lucy Davis as Etta Candy, Trevor’s
secretary. She really wasn’t in enough to be mentioned in the review, but she
is hysterical. I laughed particularly hard while they were trying to get Diana
some ‘London appropriate’ clothing. One of the best lines of the movie, Trevor
puts a pair of glasses on Diana to make her ‘less conspicuous,’ her quip, “yeah
put spectacles on her, like that’ll make her less of the most attractive woman
you’ve ever seen.” She’s funny and unfortunately, we’ll never see her or the
rest of Diana’s team again. Which is the same kind problem that Steve Rogers had in Captain America. The being set nearly a
hundred years in the past make it kind of impossible for the old characters to
pop up again. There is also this completely unnecessary point of Dr. Poison
creating a super stimulant gas for Luddenorff. Something that he inhales and
gives him temporary super strength. Why? So, he can have a quick fist fight
with Diana. Only reason. It was an unnecessary minor plot point for an
unnecessary minor fight. All I’m saying. And finally, certain twists could be
seen from space. Specifically, what the Godkiller, the weapon to kill Ares,
actually is, and whom Ares human form is. Pretty much the second these plot
points come up, you’ll know who’s who.
Overall, A-. This is an amazing
movie that I recommend to everybody. Diana does an excellent job on her first
solo outing, and truly earns the title of Wonder Woman. If you haven’t seen it
yet, go see it. My nitpicks are just that, nitpicks. I thoroughly enjoyed this
movie and can’t wait to see more of WW in the DCU. If she is a sign of things
to come, then it looks like said DCU has finally found it’s grove. Have a good night
everybody.
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