Selena's after two things, shiny objects and cats.
Last time on Batman: Caped
Crusader, Detective Montoya and Batman investigated a disappearance. Horror
movie starlet Yvonne Francis was kidnapped outside her home after a date with
millionaire Bruce Wayne. Batman decided to let Montoya do most of the leg work
on this one, following her from a distance and listening in on a microphone he
planted on her. Montoya’s investigation led her to Basil Karlo, a talented
actor that worked opposite Francis as the monster in several films. He claimed
to have not seen her in months, but Montoya learned he was at the same party as
her earlier that week. She goes to investigate him further but finds him
murdered in his apartment. Batman meets the murderer outside, a man with a
gnarly face dressed in black with a red scarf. Batman chases after him but the
man escapes. Montoya continues her investigation, learning that Karlo had
developed a fixation on Francis and was desperate to change his face, believing
that was keeping him and Francis apart. He paid a makeup artist named Ellman to
make a treatment to make him prettier but the two had a falling out some time
ago. At the same time, the Man in Black works around Batman and Montoya,
murdering Lew Valentine the studio owner. He makes an attempt on Hayes life,
the director Basil Karlo used to work with. Batman saves Hayes, the two have a
sword fight but Batman is buried under a collapsed set. He finds Valentine’s
body and another victim, Daryl Manning another actor. Batman, knowing that
Montoya just interviewed Manning checks on Basil Karlo’s corpse and finds that
his face is yielding and malleable like clay.
Montoya goes to interview Ellman, who attacks her and captures her. When
she wakes up, she learns that she’s dealing with Clayface, Basil Karlo. He had
been getting revenge on his coworkers that he felt slighted him in the past,
type casting him as the villain into oblivion because of his dour face. He got
the treatment to get Francis, but she rejected him even after he made himself
more handsome, this seemed to cause his face to melt, and he decided to get payback.
Francis distracts him by critiquing his performance and saying his acting isn’t
great, and Batman bursts in to stop him. While Batman and Clayface fight,
Montoya is freed and frees Francis. Batman knocks Clayface out. Montoya pulls
her gun on Batman, but the arrival of corrupt cops Flass and Bullock let Batman
escape. She finds the mic on her jacket and uses it to tell Batman they aren’t
done yet. Enough recap. Let’s get to it.
Ep 3: Kiss Of The Catwoman
We open with Bruce at Gotham
Museum. They’re displaying the Wayne family jewels, including his mother’s
iconic pearls. We see a photographer named Eel O’Brian (Tom Kenny) taking shots
of the event. Bruce is looking at said pearls and feeling things when Selina
Kyle (Christina Ricci) approaches him and starts hitting on him. Well, hitting
on him and admiring his mother’s necklace, saying she wants pearls just like
these. Bruce ask if he should be
worried, as Selina has a reputation for being a kleptomaniac. She says she
likes nice things, but they accidentally come home with her. She shifts it to
flirting, saying they’re both rich orphans. Bruce points out that technically
she’s not an orphan as her father is alive, just in jail for tax fraud. She
says that they probably have more in common that half the floozies she’s seen
Bruce with. Bruce is distracted by two reporters talking about the pearls. One
points out they’ve got to be worth 10-20K, the other saying who the hell would
wear something like that in Crime Alley? The implication that his parents were
asking to get mugged and murdered is enough to send Bruce into a blind rage and
he decked the reporter, O’Brian getting a great shot of the punch and Selina
saying, “oh my,” in an intrigued way.
We cut to Bruce explaining the
event to a therapist. Lucius Fox apparently worked out a deal with Harvey Dent
the DA that he just has to see this therapist for a few sessions to prove he’s
not a danger to society. His therapist, Dr. Harleen Quinzel (Jamie Chung),
seems genuinely interested in helping him. Bruce claims he’s not the
bellyaching type, but Harleen points out that talking to a therapist aka
bellyaching is part of his no jail time for assault deal, so he should probably
start. She asks if he’s ever reacting violently before. He claims he’s not the
sort to blow his top, but Harleen points out that he did blow his top.
Bruce admits hearing someone talk about his mom negatively set him off. Harleen
says that his parents are an obvious but natural sore spot for him and asks if
he’d like to talk about it. Bruce refuses, saying it was a long time ago and
was awful but he’s beyond it. He also
eyes his file on Harleen’s table. Harleen says that repressed trauma is
something he might not even realize he’s doing. Bruce tunes her out as he
flashes back to that night. An officer interviewed young Bruce (Santino
Barnard) asking if he could identify the mugger/murderer but Bruce is too
traumatized to remember anything. Alfred
pulls him aside and says he needs to be taken home.
Later, Alfred asks Bruce how
therapy was and Bruce says it was a waste of an hour. He says that Harleen
thinks she can get into his head, but he’s not going to let that happen. He
opens her file on him that he must have swiped when leaving, only to find it
just has blank sheets of paper inside and a note saying she’ll see him next
week.
We cut to Selina Kyle’s apartment.
She and her many cats are awoken by her maid, Greta who tells her it’s already
midafternoon. Greta tells her there are more bills today and Selina says to put
them with the others, aka the fireplace. Greta is very concerned about their
finances, as the electricity is going to be cut in a few days and because she
hasn’t been paid in quite some time. Selina deflects by saying it’s not her
fault her dad left them with nothing. Greta asks if she could at least stop
bringing cats home as the food bill for them is insane. There are at least a
dozen cats in this shot so Greta does have a point. Selina says not to worry
about it, Greta sarcastically saying her tone of voice fills her with
confidence. Selina sees a front-page story about Batman and has an idea. She
asks Greta if they still have a sewing machine. She fashions a Catwoman costume
and asks Greta if she thinks it’s fabulous, Greta says that’s not the word
she’d use.
We get a newspaper montage of
Selina performing dozens of burglaries as Catwoman over the course of several
days. Seems like the rich debutant has a natural talent for theft. She’s
spotted at one of her heists, but she escapes the uniform cops before running
into Flass and Bullock. She dodges around Flass and slashes Bullock across his
face before running off, dodging them in an alley by rapidly climbing up a few
feet. That’s when Batman drops in on her, asking who she is. Catwoman flirts
with Batman a little, saying he’s sexier than the sketch made him out to be and
that he ‘inspires’ her before trying to run. He catches her with one of his
bolos. She’s shocked to learn he has toys. Bullock and Flass find her tied up
and arrest her. Catwoman is unmasked as Selina Kyle, Bullock calling her the
high society klepto. She’s put in the back of their car and she sees Batman
driving off in the batmobile, saying it’s a nice car.
We get another flashback to Alfred
driving young Bruce back to the mansion. Alfred asks if he’d like a cup of hot
cocoa when they get back to the house, but Bruce doesn’t answer. Bruce comes
out of his flashback in Dr. Quinzel’s office, Harleen asking him a question.
Bruce tells her the not-a-total lie that he had a late night with a lady friend
and asks her to repeat the question. Harleen points out that last week she
learned that Bruce was clearly repressing things about his parent’s murder and
tries again to get him to open up. Asking if he’s repressing himself in other
ways. She points that he’s basically a rich playboy stereotype. Bruce says that
maybe that is just the way he is. Harleen says she’s seen him in the society
pages but asks how many times he’s been on a second date or if the women he
hangs out with are anything more than accessories to him. Bruce says he’s just
playing the field, and that life is different for someone like him. Harleen
pointedly says “for the rich” and makes a note.
We jump over to Selina’s trial.
She’s playing the victim, claiming to have been at the wrong place at the wrong
time and it was Batman that stole those gems. The Judge is skeptical as he’s
seen Selina several times before but asks the DA his thoughts. Harvey tells him
that because the gems were returned and they can’t definitively prove Selina’s
story about Batman doing it isn’t true, that the city is willing to drop the
charges and give her another chance. Flass and Bullock are watching from the
stands and looking unimpressed, as is Barbara. After the trial Barbara accuses
Harvey of going soft on Selina because she’s rich and famous. She asks if
Selina is a campaign donor. Harvey asks if she really thinks he’d sink that
low, when she glares, he admits he might… if Selina wasn’t flat broke. Selina
leaves the courthouse and is picked up by Greta. Greta asks if they’re headed
home but Selina says they need to get some work done on the car.
Later, another Cop teases Bullock
for losing such an easy case. Bullock almost takes a swing at him, but Flass
stops him, saying that the cat is running out of lives, she just doesn’t know
it yet. We cut to Bruce hitting a boxing bag in his home gym while listening to
the news, learning that Selina got off. Bruce is angry to hear they let her go,
Alfred sarcastically adding that she promised never to do it again.
That night, Selina starts burgling
again. She steals a bunch of jewels from a rich couple as they sleep and their
cat, adding insult to injury. Batman
finds her showing off the jewels to the cat. He chases after her across the
rooftops, Selina showing an impressive level of fitness as she runs in
heels. That is until she slips because
of them and falls. Batman catches her and lowers them down with his grapple
gun, Selina calling him her hero and kissing him. You’ve never seen a man less
into a kiss, other than maybe Dio kissing Jo Jo’s girlfriend if you’ve seen the
series Jo Jo’s Bizarre Adventure. Once they touch down, he pushes her
off and says she’s wasting his time. She pulls electrified brass knuckles on
him, stunning him and allowing her to run to her cat mobile and drive off.
Batman is clearly annoyed.
Bullock and Flass head to the Kyle
penthouse to arrest Selina, only to find it empty save for a bag of kitty
litter. Selina got them a year’s lease on a crummy apartment on the Eastside of
Gotham to hide out in. Greta is annoyed by the downgrade in their living
arrangements. Selina points out that she’s paid off most of her debts with last
night’s take as well. She says that they have to make accommodations if they’re
to live as outlaws, Greta angrily pointing out she never asked to live like an
outlaw.
Batman reads about Selina’s
exploits in the paper and angrily crumples it up. Alfred suggests that he try
to get some sleep and maybe let the police handle her as she’s really just a
burglar with a gimmick, not a true villain. He also points out that Bruce Wayne
has appointments today, giving Batman an idea. He goes to get changed and tells
Alfred to get the limo. He heads to Gotham Museum and tells the curator he’s
pulling his collection from their display. After the string of burglaries, he
doesn’t feel safe having them out like this, or so he claims. The curator begs
him to let her keep the collection through the weekend and he relents. He gets
in his limo, saying the plan is set and they can head home, but Alfred points
out he’s got another therapy session. Meanwhile, Selina hears about the closing
of the jewelry exhibit and seems intrigued.
Bruce points out that this is his
last session with Harleen and adding that he thinks she’s helped him out a lot.
Harleen says that she will sign his paperwork, but she’s doing it reluctantly.
She says she doesn’t think Bruce is a danger to himself or others, but she also
doesn’t think they’ve made progress together. She says she sees a lot of
wealthy men that just gush to her about their guilty secrets and dark desires
on her. She says that she knows Bruce has only shown her a façade but that
she’s willing to keep going and work with him if he’ll just let his walls down.
Bruce says no. Outside he gives Alfred the paperwork and says to make sure it
gets to Lucius. Alfred asks if he’s sure he didn’t get anything out of therapy,
Bruce says it was a waste of time and to drop it. But Alfred sees him looking…
troubled in the rearview mirror. We get another flashback to young Bruce. On a
dark and stormy night sometime after the murder, Bruce remembers the night. He
sees the mugger Joe Chill (at least I assume that’s who done it, we don’t get a
name) coming out of the dark and shooting Thomas and Martha, Bruce visibly
flinching as he remembers the gun shots. He then goes to Alfred and tells him
he’s going to make all the criminals pay for what they did and that Alfred is
going to help him.
In the present, Alfred tells Batman
that even if he catches Selina, the judge might just let her go again, but
Batman tells him not this time. Batman finds O’Brian the photographer taking
picks of a city councilman cheating on his wife. He scares the shit out of
O’Brian and almost knocks him off the fire escape. But Batman catches him and
tells O’Brian that he needs him.
We cut to Gotham Museum as Selina
goes for the Wayne pearls. She set off the silent alarm as she came and Flass
and Bullock are also on their way. Batman confronts Catwoman, O’Brian taking
shots from the second floor. Selina sicks a panther she brought on Batman. Girl
has too many cats! Batman throws smoke pellets at the panther but it just leaps
at him. Bullock and Flass arrive and start chasing Selina. Batman holds the
Panther off until the gas knocks it out, taking a deep breath once the gas
clears and gets up. Flass takes a shot at Selena, winging her leg. Bullock gets
the cuffs ready, but Flass tells him they won’t need those. He gets in close to
finish Selena off, but Batman grabs him and beats the crap out of him, Bullock
standing by since he can’t get a shot on Batman. Until he throws Flass at
Bullock and then knocks him out. O’Brian takes several more pics. Batman binds
Selena’s leg, she tries to flirt with him again but he’s not paying her
attention, and he cuffs her leg to a table. She says he’s no fun at all and
Batman agrees.
Outside, he finds O’Brian. O’Brian
has the shots but it’s on the same reel of film of him fighting Flass. O’Brian
is clearly terrified of Batman and offers to destroy all the photos to get rid
of the police fighting evidence, but Batman tells him just to make sure the
Catwoman photos run in the paper, he doesn’t care about the rest. He
grapple-guns away.
The next morning, Selena calls
Greta and tells her to bail Selena out. Greta tells her that’s not going to be
possible as she’s got no money. Selena tells her to pawn a few things to get
bail, but then Greta reveals that she already sold everything that Selena had
in the apartment. She’s taking the money as 3 years backpay and is going to
head out on a cruise. Selena looks utterly flabbergasted that Greta abandoned
her. Which is why I say, pay your employees.
Back at the Cave, Alfred says that
Catwoman has been taken care of. Batman knows she’ll be back, but he’s got a
break from her nonsense for now. Alfred points out that the photos might be
more of a problem for him than Catwoman was. Batman agrees but says that now
they know he’s coming for them. Whether he means the corrupt cops or crooks in
general is anyone’s guess. Alfred tries
to talk to Batman about seeing Dr. Quinzel again for more therapy, but Batman
says that the coffee is cold, an obvious dismissal. Alfred goes to get him a
fresh cup. We get one last flashback of Alfred cleaning the car window that
night before hearing several gun shots and running to see what happened. Kind
of a dark ending.
I think it’s an interesting choice
to make Batman and Catwoman have zero chemistry in this first outing. Seems
like for as long as I’ve been following DC media Bruce and Selena have always
had a spark regardless of adaptation, be it animated or live action, and if I
recall correctly she’s been Bruce’s primary romantic interest in comics for a
while. But I suppose this is an early version of Bruce, some speculate that
he’s been doing the Batman thing for weeks at the start of the series, so he’s
maybe just too stiff for Selena. The fact that this version is a much more
spoiled ditz doesn’t help the situation either. It is funny to be that it looks
like she’s got a natural talent for burglary once she set her mind to it, like
if she’d picked this up when Bruce was still out training she’d be one of the
most notorious criminals in Gotham it seems. I also liked how each outing had
her escalate a bit. First, she’s just a burglar in a dress and heels, then
she’s also got a few gadgets and a car, and finally she’s using her unique
gifts to bring animals to crime scenes. She’s like the most natural criminal to
date in this series. Also, props to the show for showing how the criminal
justice system tends to work, ie, if you have looks and fame (famous or
infamous) you get more second chances than poor people. And finally on Selena,
her face when she learned Greta is peacing out was priceless. It was
interesting to see that Flass was the one who was going to finish off Selena.
Thus far, he seems to prefer pushing off dirty work onto Bullock, but I guess
something about Selena must have irked him. I liked that Bruce ultimately chose
to make sure Selena was arrested even if it made his job harder since the
pictures 1. Prove he exists, and 2. Imply he’s willing to beat up cops. While
Gordon knows, or at least suspects, Flass and Bullock are crooked, no one else
does so they’ll just see him punching a police detective. Not a great look if
you don’t have proof of villainy. So, Selena’s in jail and the Bat’s out of the
bag. We’ll see where the story goes from here. Have a good night.
Patreon:https://www.patreon.com/posts/110923960
Twitter: @BasicsSuperhero
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