I’ll start this post out by saying
this, love or hate Spider-Man as a character, love or hate Spider-Man as a film, we owe the modern Marvel Cinematic Universe
to him/it. It was the immense financial success of Spider-Man and X-Men film
series that convinced the execs over at Marvel to finally give making movies a
shot. They made Iron-Man and the rest
is history. Let’s take a look back, shall we?
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| Spider-Man, Spider-Man, does whatever a Spider can. |
Spider-Man
opens to Peter Parker (Tobey McGuire) running after a bus. Yeah, apparently
someone thought Peter being bullied by other students wouldn’t be enough, so
they got the bus driver to be a dick to him too. Jerks. Where are they going?
To Columbia University’s science lab as part of a school field trip. Funded by
Oscorp, nothing ominous about that. Peter fails miserably at getting Mary Jane
Watson (Kirsten Dunst) to notice him before meeting up with his best friend
Harry Osborn (James Franko), who arrived in a limo with his father, Norman
Osborn (Willem Dafoe). Pause, there’s something wrong with this set up that has
bugged me for years. Harry, you didn’t offer to give Peter a ride in the limo
knowing that stuff like chasing the bus is a regular incident for him? Shame on
you. Anyway, they get inside and have a look at what Oscorp is working on.
There’s a giant electron microscope, some weird chemicals, and a giant wall of
genetically altered super-spider’s on display. What an oddly chaotic lab set
up. The Spiders were altered to show off the powers that Peter will later gain;
super strength, super jumping, and a borderline precognitive spider sense. MJ
points out that one of the enclosures is empty, and the tour guide just brushes
it off with a “oh they must still be working on that one.” BS. In a high tech
lab like that, you know exactly how many experiments are going on, and you
freak the heck out when one has apparently vanished. Said spider was chilling
in web it had set-up in a corner.
Both Peter and Harry weirdly try to
flirt with MJ, Harry using info lifted from Peter to appear smart, while Peter
asks her to ‘model’ in a few shots for the school paper. Peter, Harry, I’ve
been down the “buddies flirt with same girl” road before, it doesn’t end well.
After Mary Jane is called away, the Spider drops down from the ceiling and
bites Peter. It hurts like hell, but, nothing too unusual happens.
We jump to Oscorp labs. Norman
Osborn and Doctor Stromm show off their products to a General, in the hopes of
keeping their military funding. Despite Norman’s insistence that their new
performance enhancement drugs is ready for human testing, Stromm is less
certain. Norman is given the ultimatum of have a human test in 2 weeks, or lose
their funding. Not a great situation.
Peter returns home to his Aunt May
(Rosemary Harris) and Uncle Ben (Cliff Robertson). Ben gives some exposition
about being laid off and how the family finances are rather tight. Peter rushes
to his room, as the spider’s venom seems to finally be affecting him. He passes
out, and we get a weird montage as Peter’s DNA mutates. We jump back to Norman
and Stromm, who are prepping a to expose Norman to their performance enhancing
drug. Osborn goes in, gets vaped, seems to have a stroke and dies. Stromm pulls
him out, just in time for Norman’s heart to kick back on. In an insane fit,
Norman attacks Stromm, tossing him into some lab equipment, killing him.
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| The itsy bitsy spider crawled up the water spout. Down came the goblin, who took the spider out. |
Jump back to Peter, who, after a
fitful night, awakes to 20/20 vision, a much more muscular physique and spider
powers. Best spider-bite ever. He walks out to see Mr. Watson berating MJ. He
thinks about going over and trying to comfort her, but misses out when her
friends pick her up. He also misses the bus. Bad luck. He is able to chase down
the bus, and rip off the banner on the side off it, thanks to his new powers.
At Osborn manner, Harry finds Norman passed out on the floor, with no memory of
the previous night. He’s informed of Stromm’s death, and that Oscorps
experimental glider and flight suit were ‘stolen.’
At School, Peter shows off more of
his powers, like his spider-sense, adhesion, and the ability to produce and
shoot webbing. Which nobody notices until he accidently hits bully Flash
Thompson with a tray of food. Flash chases him down, Peter shows off his new
strength, agility, and speed, knocking Flash away by several feet. Odd how no
one seems to remember this a few months later after he becomes Spider-Man, isn’t
it? Nerd shows off inhuman abilities shortly before a superhero shows up. NO
one questions this? After ditching the rest of school, he climbs a wall for the
first time, tests out his super jumping, and tries to fire more webs. He tries
several ‘hand signs” before getting his signature “I love you” sign. He web-swings,
and ends up hitting a billboard. First flights are always a little bumpy. Hours
later, I never understood this jump in time, he returns home just in time to
see MJ suffer some more verbal abuse. Not creepy at all. They bond a little in
the backyard, before Flash pulls up in his new car. She runs off, and he gets
the notion that to get the girl, he’ll need a car. Cause, you know, no woman
was ever impressed by SUPERPOWERS. For a smart kid,
Pete can be an idiot.
He picks up a paper and finds the
perfect car and a way to get the money. Amateur wrestling. He puts his artistic
skills to the test, and designs his Spider-Man suit. He practices with his
powers some more before the big night. Back with the Osborns, Norman is hearing
cackling laughter. Also, not ominous at all. Ben gives Peter a ride into town,
and tries to talk about Peter’s unusual behavior over the last few weeks. He
gives Peter the “With Great Power, Comes Great Responsibility,” lecture. Peter snaps,
telling Ben to stop pretending to be his father, and walks off in a huff. Dick move,
Peter, dick move. Peter arrives at Amateur night, and prepares to fight the
wrestler, Bone Saw McGraw. Played by Macho-Man Randy Savage. The MC of the
night, Bruce Campbell, gives him the iconic name of “the Amazing Spider-Man,” when
he’s unimpressed by Peter’s choice, “The Human Spider.” He fights Bone Saw,
showing off his impressive Spider-Powers, and pinning Bone Saw in two minutes.
Peter’s joy at victory is quickly
cut short when he’s only paid a hundred bucks. Owner is a dick. A moment later,
the owner is robbed. Peter lets the thief run, despite being in a position to stop with almost no effort, and throws the owner’s words of how this isn't Peter's problem back at
him. On the street, Peter comes across a scene, a crowd around a dying man. To
his horror, he realizes it's Uncle Ben. He’d apparently been car jacked and
shot. Ben dies as Peter clutches his hand. Peter, in a fury, tracks down the
killer at the docks and beats him within an inch of his life. To his utter
disgust, the murderer happened to be the guy he let escape. The Thief dies
after tumbling out a window. Peter returns home and grieves with Aunt May.
Meanwhile, Oscorp’s rival, Quest Aerospace,
tests out their Iron-Man… er, exoskeleton battle suit. The testing is
interrupted by a cackling Goblin, who murders them all.
An unspecified amount of time
later, Peter graduates. He and Norman seem to form something of a father-son
bond, as Harry seems to make a move on the recently single MJ. Violating the
Bro-Code, Osborn. Peter grieves some more, get used to it, Tobey’s Peter cries
a lot. After some encouraging words from Aunt May, Peter decides to use his
Great Power, becoming Spider-Man. Editor of the Daily Bugle, J. Jonah Jameson
(J. K. Simmons) wants pictures of Spider-Man, and offers big bucks for them.
Peter meets MJ on the street, and learns she’s dating Harry, on his way home to
his and Harry’s apartment. Harry tries to get Norman to help Peter find a
steady job, but Peter isn’t interested in a handout. Which is when he sees
Bugle’s ad. He sets up a camera, and gives the pics to Jonah. Peter tries to
get a job, but is instead told to be a freelance photographer.
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| Vengeance, thy name is Norman Virgil Osborn. |
Back at Osborn manner, Norman has a
psychotic episode and learns that he’s the Green Goblin. His “Goblin” persona
decides to try and get Spider-Man on his/their side. Gobby attacks Jameson,
wanting to know who gets Spider-Man’s pictures. Thankfully, Peter had just been
in, and comes back in as Spider-Man. Gobby knocks him out, takes him to a roof,
and makes his offer. They join forces and rule. Peter isn’t interested, and
while angry, Goblin lets him go to think it over.
Peter saves MJ from a mugging, and
have an upside-down make out session. Is that cheating? That feels like
cheating… Later on, Peter saves some folks from a burning building, and is
attacked by Green Goblin. In their fight, Peter gets a sizeable cut on his arm, but is able to escape. To the Goblin's irritation. Later on, Norman arrives at the Parker/Osborn apartment for Thanksgiving dinner. Peter
swings in a moment later, drawing his family, friends and nemesis’s attention.
He jumps to the ceiling just in time. Norman notices some blood falling from
the ceiling, but still misses Peter. Peter comes in from street, and the meal commences.
Peter starts bleeding, and Norman notices that it’s in the same place as
Spider-Man. Peter… why the heck didn’t you get a band-aide on that? Norman
storms off to prepare, but not before belittling MJ and her and Harry’s
relationship. Real stellar parenting there, Norman, implanting in your son's head that women will only ever love him for his money.
Later that night, Norman/Goblin
plan to destroy Spider-Man by attacking Peter. “The Heart, Osborn. First, we
attack his heart!”as his Goblin persona put it. Love that line. First target? Aunt May. He blows away the roof of her house and does... something to her. They're pretty vague about it. She’s rushed to the
hospital, freaked out but otherwise okay. Peter realizes that Goblin knows his
identity. After chatting with MJ and Aunt May the next day, Peter also realizes
who the Goblin is going to target next. Around the same time, Harry, not on
purpose, gives Norman the idea to attack Mary Jane. Peter calls MJ, get’s Gobby,
who lures him to the Queensboro Bridge. At the Bridge, Goblin sings merrily as
he prepares his plan. “The itsy bitsy spider climbed up the water spout, down
came the Goblin who took the Spider out.” His plan is simple, but effective.
Mary Jane in one hand, a cable car filled with kids in the other, and he lets
them both drop. “Let die the woman you love, or suffer the little children,” as he so eloquently put it when Peter arrives. Peter jumps after MJ, grabs her, and then swings around to grab the cable car.
He’s forced to hold on to both while a barge sails into place, all the while
surviving an assault by Gobby. Peter probably wouldn’t have made it, if the New
Yorkers on the bridge above hadn’t started throwing trash at Gobby to distract
him. The kids and MJ are saved, but Gobby isn’t done yet. He grab’s Peter and
takes him to a burnt building. Is it spoiling the end of a movie by talking
about it, when said movie is nearly 15 years old? Don’t care, doing it anyway,
but you have been warned.
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| Didn't have the definitive Spider-Man, Green Goblin or Mary Jane, But it did have the definitive J. Jonah Jameson. |
The good first. The cast is pretty
darn good. JK Simmons is phenomenal as the greedy and paranoid JJ Jameson. His
part was sooo good that the reboot went out of its way to NOT cast anyone else
in the part. Talk about big shoes to fill. I am a huge fan of Willem Defoe, and
love him as Norman and The Green Goblin. Sure, he can ham it up a bit, but if
you’ve read the original issues of Spider-Man, ol’ Gobby can be pretty darn
hammy. Tobey McGuire, Kirsten Dunst, and James Franko are pretty good at each
of their parts too. They aren’t what I’d call the “definitive” versions of the
characters, but they aren’t bad by any stretch of the imagination. The effects
haven’t aged great, but they’re still pretty good considering the time.
The bad is minimal, but there.
Peter Parker is a bit of a crybaby in this series. I’ve seen just about every
iteration of Spider-Man there is, and I can tell you that while the deaths of
his various loved ones still haunt him to this day, he rarely breaks down into
tears because of it. He may linger on a photo of Uncle Ben or one of the other
fallen loved ones, he may even get slightly choked up, but he never sobs like
Tobey’s Peter. Also, as Spider-Man, he’s not nearly as funny as he’s supposed
to be. I think I mentioned this in my Spider-Man hero profile, but if not, here
it is. There are two huge elements to Spider-Man’s fighting style. One, is his
spider-sense, that allows him to react to threats at nearly a moment’s notice,
and the other is his sense of humor. He’s constantly cracking wise or spouting
one liners or just talking in general while fighting. Why? Because it keeps his
foes off balance. It’s like trash-talking while playing basketball. It’s hard
enough to act, or fight, while focusing in on your task. It gets even harder
when an arachnid themed weirdo in a leotard is constantly pushing your buttons.
And finally, I think the final fight didn’t quite have the weight the film
makers were going for. In the comics, Spider-Man and Green Goblin fought for
years before they had their ‘final’ confrontation. It was the culmination of
over a decade’s worth of fighting, with the final line being crossed when
Norman attacked and caused the death of Peter’s girlfriend Gwen Stacey. It was
the end of an era. Does that sound like something that could be fit into one 2-hour
movie? I don’t think so.
Overall, I give this movie a B. Is
it the best Superhero movie? Far from it. But, it’s still pretty darn good, and
I cannot deny its effect on popular culture and the superhero movie genre. If
you haven’t seen it, somehow, I do recommend it. It’s cheesy, but in a good
way. And, while I find its portrayal of Peter Parker/Spider-Man as a little too
mopey and a little too grim, it’s still an overall good representation of the
source material. And, unlike the sequels, it didn’t beat you over the head with
the “With great power, comes great responsibility” line. It had just the right
amount. Those are my thoughts on Sam Raimi’s Spider-Man. Next time, let’s take a look at a lesser known DC
villain, Arnold Wesker aka the Ventriloquist and his dummy Scarface.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Spider-Man_(2002_film)#/media/File:Spider-Man2002Poster.jpg
http://spiderman-films.wikia.com/wiki/The_Green_Goblin_(Willem_Dafoe)
http://spiderman-films.wikia.com/wiki/File:F_25694.jpg
http://vignette2.wikia.nocookie.net/spiderman-films/images/b/bf/Jameson.jpg/revision/latest?cb=20151206155914
http://spiderman-films.wikia.com/wiki/File:F_25694.jpg
http://vignette2.wikia.nocookie.net/spiderman-films/images/b/bf/Jameson.jpg/revision/latest?cb=20151206155914
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